'Darcy and O'Mara' is a novel by Arthur Cronin.
Click here to buy the paperback or download the ebook for free.


Thursday, February 23, 2006
 

News: Doubt Cast on Microphone Jump


Ping Hennigen has invented a computerised voice box that will come up with an excuse for any awkward situation you find yourself in -- you just have to move your lips to the sound of the voice. It can be set to say either 'It was you who said it was a fire engine' or 'A goat ate my shoe'.


The Ballydeelin Research and Development Group have given their approval to the voice box, but they've cast doubt over another other recent invention by Ping: jumping over a microphone on a BMX. Critics have suggested that it's not really an invention at all, and that he came nowhere near jumping over the microphone anyway. They say he cycled into a wall and said, "I'm going for a shower."


This comes just a few months after the Group dismissed the glass he invented. They also questioned his claim to have invented a coat that will make you invisible at weekends. They pointed out that Ping tends to get lost in the forest a lot.


Tuesday, February 21, 2006
 

Headphones

Headphones that will hypnotise you into thinking you're watching mud wrestling when you're attending the marriage of the person you love to someone who put a dead crow in your car.

Friday, February 17, 2006
 

A Robot.

A robot that will take your place at events you'd rather not attend. Says 'Mommy' and runs with out-stretched arms towards replacement hips.

Tuesday, February 14, 2006
 

Business Cards

Business cards that can be used as sunglasses if you've got exceptionally good eyesight.

Saturday, February 11, 2006
 

A Telescope

A telescope that really, really likes you.

Thursday, February 09, 2006
 

News: Inventions Night in Ballydeelin.

The Ballydeelin Research and Development Group held a showcase for local inventors last Friday night. The Mayor himself took part, with a camera that he claims can photograph ghosts. Unfortunately, the images he exhibited on the night were all of him killing chickens. "I don't know how all fifty-six of them got in there," he said.

Another highlight was the Mayor's brother, Joe. He invented a voodoo doll dictionary. If you say a word, the doll will give a definition. On the night, the only phrases the doll said were things like 'set the table, Ally MacBeal' or 'fail in your job, Ally MacBeal'. "He's doing this on purpose," Joe said. "He's been angry with me since I stuck a pin in his back. But he does give very good advice on relationships too. Now wouldn't be the best time to ask about that."

 

A Bon Jovi Fan.

The longest Bon Jovi fan on the planet. Special thongs required.

Wednesday, February 08, 2006
 

A Dimmer Switch

An interactive dimmer switch that answers 'He's gone to get the scissors' when you ask it a question.

Wednesday, February 01, 2006
 

News: Vampire Bat Key Ring Knows Foot.

Trucie Gallagher unveiled his latest invention yesterday. It's a vampire bat that he trained to be a key ring. He guarantees that you'll never lose your keys again, unless the bat gets lost, or hides because he's angry with you (Trucie has also trained the bat to understand the concept of its own birthday, and he says the bat would be very upset with you if you forgot that). He also trained the bat to say 'yes' or 'no' when you ask the question 'is that my foot?'. A member of The Ballydeelin Research and Development Group has said that the bat says 'yes' in a very funny way when you ask 'is that my neck?'. Trucie says you're not supposed to say 'is that my neck?'.

The Ballydeelin Research and Development Group have revealed that they're working on stair steps that say things when you stand on them. Some of the basic phrases used by the steps will by 'have you lost weight?', or 'no, that's not creaking, it's just... it's just Jimmy; he's digging a hole'.


The Tree and the Horse
Very Slight Stories
Henry Seaward-Shannon
A Walk in the Rain
Mizzenwood
Words are my favourite noises






Links:
bifsniff.com
www.aidanmoran.com
www.savagechickens.com/blog
cowboydog.blogspot.com
Cartoon Modern
http://drawn.ca
Scratch
Humor Links



More blogs about humor.
Technorati Blog Finder







Archives

July 2005   August 2005   September 2005   October 2005   November 2005   December 2005   January 2006   February 2006   March 2006   April 2006   May 2006   June 2006   July 2006   August 2006   September 2006   October 2006   November 2006   December 2006   July 2007   August 2007   September 2007   October 2007   November 2007   December 2007   January 2008   February 2008   March 2008   April 2008   May 2008   June 2008   July 2008   August 2008   September 2008   October 2008   December 2008   January 2009   February 2009   March 2009   April 2009   May 2009   June 2009   July 2009   August 2009   November 2009  

This page is powered by Blogger. Isn't yours?