The Ballydeelin Research and Development Group have recently been looking at ways to get more students into technology related subjects, and as part of their research they have found that Goths are drawn to courses like Marine Biology, whereas New Romantics will go for either medicine or a job in their father's farm machinery company.

Researchers have also found that 100% of all Goths will write 'it was a badger' on Davy Fenton's 'get well' card. 33.33% of Goths will have played the part of a submarine in a school play when they were nine. 100% of punks will blame a hole in the ground for an amazing last minute miss that cost Ballydeelin the match in the Junior B hurling, and will threaten people with a meat hook if they question his story about the hole, then be subjected to weeks of ridicule, with people calling him Thomas to remind him of the time he answered 'Thomas the Tank Engine' in the final question of a table quiz, when the correct answer was a caravan, before finally snapping and spray-painting the words 'I don't care if it was Jumbo the ___ Elephant, I'll still ___ ___ ___ ___ with a ___ meat hook' across the dressing rooms. Isn't that right, Jimmy?

A very loud falling thing that falls and is very loud. Can also be used as a wig.

A shoe rack that Polly will make herself and give to you in Christmas wrapping paper on Christmas Eve, and cry when you don't turn up for her New Year's party. (Polly not included).

A blue thing that goes 'blip' and sets fire to a red thing that goes 'ah!'.

The Ballydeelin Research and Development Group have said they have scientific proof that websites do tend to look like their owners. They say they'll be presenting their findings at a conference next month, but critics have suggested that the only concrete evidence for this is from a Mr. Sheehan, who tattoed the words 'page not found' across his forehead.

'Sinker' Daly has claimed that the mayor's wife has a word tattoed on a certain part of her body, and in this repect it looks just like her website. The mayor has responded by saying that Sinker is 'confused'. The Ballydeelin Research and Development Group have said that websites will tend to look like dogs if you're looking at a website about dogs.

A trumpet that will constantly plan a means of escape.

A plastic cactus that works in a supermarket and thinks it's Elvis.

A radio that converts sounds into a form that mushrooms would be most responsive to.