An iron that knows the difference between Tarzan and Jane, but it believes that everyone is either Tarzan or Jane. It prefers Jane, as can be seen in the way it treats their clothes.

This is the latest invention of Hizzy Hickey. Some people have claimed that the iron's instruction manual was written by 500 monkeys playing 500 cellos, but Hizzy insists that the monkeys and cellos are for an unrelated project.

A magnifying glass that poisons sheep. Its inventor says he just wanted to see the tiny dancers in the nooks and crannies of his shed, laughing as they go around and around, holding hands, and that the poisoning of the sheep was just a useful side-effect.

A wardrobe that cleans the blood from your golf shoes.

A milk jug that tells you when you're wearing the wrong trousers. Ideal for parties or picnics, but it doesn't matter anyway (Sinker Daly has been adding the 'doesn't matter anyway' clause to many of his inventions recently).

Small dogs you can prepare for shows to distract you from the fruitless inquiries you'd make into why your attic is missing.